Lenten Lessons

There are days... you know. Like "it's been one of Those Days" (with a capital D). When you are buried in schoolwork and your computer mysteriously goes kaput. And you get hit with several Large and Unexpected bills. And you go out on a limb to try this great bread recipe which is guaranteed to work except your boyfriend keeps telling you it isn't rising enough and despite your optimism he is Right and it's a complete failure. And it's Lent so you can't even eat chocolate to cheer yourself up and the failed bread is a poor substitute... And then you step in... well, you know, somewhere on your way to the gym to burn off the bread and have to scrape it off to the best of your ability in the Y bathroom...

On "Those Days" counting your blessings in the conventional sense simply is not enough and you have to pull out The Book.

You know? Ruth Werner's A Massage Therapist's Guide to Pathology, Third Edition? It works every time. All I need is to spend a few minutes leafing through that weighty tome, perusing the vivid full color pictures and reading descriptions including phrases like "This is an extraordinarily painful condition" or "itching gets continually worse and worse" or "crust forms once blisters have erupted" and I feel better right away.

I am then able to give thanks again. Thank you tubby little body for carrying me through the 34 years of my life without a single cold sore or genital herpes outbreak! No Shingles! No Scabies! No Fibromyalgia! No Rheumatoid Arthritis! Hallelujah and Amen!

That picture of Jock itch Really gives me the willies...